It's Christmas - YAY

Do you remember Suzy? That's right - the one with the poisonous little child! Well apparently she has 'made up' with her husband and they are all coming for Christmas dinner. I hope they don't expect to share my prize with me (have I mentioned that I won a competition?).

Oh dear, I seem to be in bad books now. There I was, minding my own business having a quiet nibble of the houseplant on top of the television when there was this demented shriek of 'stop that Oscar, NOW!'. So, of course, I panicked, knocked the plant over (straight into a bowl of pot pourri stuff) and fled the scene as quickly as I could. May take a while to wriggle out of this one I think. Still getting the evil eye. I've tried the full repertoire - the guilty slinking around, the sitting in the corner looking sorry for myself one, the creeping onto a lap for a cuddle one. None of them are working. It was only a bowl of dead flowers and bits that smelt funny, oh, and a plant I suppose. The plant is in the kitchen now having had all the broken bits chopped off - sort of Bonsai effect. Looks much better to me. :p

Ever organised the humans decide they must decorate the house - on Christmas morning no less. They have now put a ghastly fake tree up in the corner of the lounge. I tried climbing it but the branches started to bend in an alarming fashion so gave up on that pronto. Have kept them amused by playing 'Whack the tasteless ornament' on a regular basis. They are so inconsistent, normally they would be screaming and shouting at me to stop but all I get is 'oh, look at Oscar, isn't he sweet?'. Sweet, me? Do me a favour!

Have just broken an ornament - gave it a terrific left hook and it smashed into the radiator. Have pushed it to the back of the tree so hopefully they will not notice until after I get my prize!

I like Christmas Day - got a special breakfast - one of those mega expensive foil wrapped extravaganzas - trout and prawn no less. Excellent! So why don't I get this the rest of the time huh?

Suzy and her mob arrived before lunch and everyone settled down to open their presents. Where's my box? Aha, here it comes. Big fanfare - box is opened - oh, I love it! This is so devious it could have been thought up by a cat. I've won a wall mounted scratching post, does'nt sound very exciting does it? Wrong! This is a clever one - scratch hard enough and it launches cat biscuits out of the bottom as a reward. I proceed to provide endless demonstrations to the humans who think it is good fun as well.

I've also managed to get my paws on a nice portion of turkey, a sausage and some stuffing. I am one happy cat!

May have overdone it .... I feel really sick.

The day after Christmas...
Strange, everyone seems a bit off colour today. I still feel sick and the humans keep muttering about 'the hair of the dog'. Makes a change from them moaning abut me moulting everywhere I suppose. You don't think they are going to get a dog? Eek!

I have discovered the fatal flaw with my prize, you still have to rely on the humans to put the cat biscuits in it. Have just scratched like mad but no biscuits. Hmmm. Have just had a scratch at the pine cabinet again, strangely enough I now have biscuits back in my scratcher. All is fine and dandy in Oscar's world again.